Perch Island, Lake George, NY —
Perch Island is the camping island just south of Huckleberry.
This past weekend, two minutes of tense silence was punctuated by a sound that not even words could describe led Perch Island campers to believe that the thing in the watery cliff cave on the western portion of the island... whatever it is... was not through with their camping mate, Rich Garza... just yet.
Huddled, outside-the-cave sources confirmed that the thing was apparently only getting started, despite hopes that a short break after what felt like hours of cracks, thuds, and weird suction noises meant that what was done was done and at least Rich wouldn't have to suffer any longer.
At press time on Sunday evening, Park Ranger Mike Shapel had ignored the campers tearful warnings that the thing could still be hungry for more... he is still missing.
Local authorities believe that this animal has been swimming from island to island, but may have found refuge for the time being on Perch Island.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Important Note - Logistics!
Hey Guys,
An important note from Larry, Dan, and Myself (Todd)…
We’re now EIGHT days away from the 6th Annual Lake George Gentlemen's Club Weekend... dare I say "Extravaganza." This is the biggest event of the year… unless you will be traveling to Germany or Turkey… then that may qualify as the biggest event. We are up to 11… no make that ten confirmed participants and a few more stragglers hanging on the fence. We lost Doug to surgery. No wait… this just in… Doug has considered tequila to surgery as an alternative… Good on him!! That’s dedication to the cause!
We wanted to give everyone a quick update and share some more details on weekend activities, anticipated costs, what to bring, and how/when we’ll get there.
Confirmations:
1. Todd
2. Danny
3. Larry
4. Doug
5. Rick
6. Gus
7. Romeo
8. Scott Wildmoser
9. Louisville Matt
10. Cenk
11. Ken B.
Bubble People:
1. Mark the Neighbor… NJ State Charades Champ in 2005 and 2006. Lost the title when he couldn’t get his team to respond to “The Celestine Prophecy” within the required time limit.
2. Mike S. – Gentlemen’s Club “Collector of Moments.”
3. Joe K. – Has the fastest dog gone boat on this side of the Mississippi.
Cost:
We're anticipating the cost of the camping trip to be about $500 for the entire weekend, or $175/day. This will include all food/booze on the island, Thursday night hotel, boat and campsite rentals, and general camping supplies (propane, paper plates, utensils, ice, water, etc). This cost does not cover anything else we do off the island. Also, to help keep costs down and to also make sure we don't over/under buy on alcohol, suggest we all bring 1 or 2 bottles of whatever you'd like to drink - including your competition tequila.
We have to buy a lot of “necessities” in advance and will also be shopping during the weekend - so please bring cash so we can collect up front. Any overages will be divvied up and distributed back in shots of leftover tequila and chicken wings.
What to Bring:
I've attached a checklist to help you prepare for the weekend that we've used the past several years. But as a specific suggestion – bring a comfy beach chair! If there is anything on the list you do not have
and don’t want to buy (like a sleeping bag, air mattress, flashlight, clean underwear, Spartan attire etc), let me know so we can see who else has extras they can bring for you. If you have any camping supplies, like tents, coolers, lanterns, flashlights, etc, please let me know that too. We definitely need 2 more tents!
Logistics:
We'll be meeting at the Bottle King on Rt. 4 in Upper Saddle River, NJ at 2pm on Thursday. We’ll drive up Convoy style to the Blue Water Manor and get there just in time for the wet t-shirt contest. If you
can't convoy up with us you can meet us there. Just let us know in advance when you are planning on coming out in case we need to send someone out from the island with the boat. We’ve got the site until
Monday, and will start breaking camp after breakfast that morning… anyone arriving after that… well… they will be on their own.
Ok, that’s the scoop for now. Let me know if you have any questions, concerns, divine inspirations, trepidations, or words of wisdom.
An important note from Larry, Dan, and Myself (Todd)…
We’re now EIGHT days away from the 6th Annual Lake George Gentlemen's Club Weekend... dare I say "Extravaganza." This is the biggest event of the year… unless you will be traveling to Germany or Turkey… then that may qualify as the biggest event. We are up to 11… no make that ten confirmed participants and a few more stragglers hanging on the fence. We lost Doug to surgery. No wait… this just in… Doug has considered tequila to surgery as an alternative… Good on him!! That’s dedication to the cause!
We wanted to give everyone a quick update and share some more details on weekend activities, anticipated costs, what to bring, and how/when we’ll get there.
Confirmations:
1. Todd
2. Danny
3. Larry
4. Doug
5. Rick
6. Gus
7. Romeo
8. Scott Wildmoser
9. Louisville Matt
10. Cenk
11. Ken B.
Bubble People:
1. Mark the Neighbor… NJ State Charades Champ in 2005 and 2006. Lost the title when he couldn’t get his team to respond to “The Celestine Prophecy” within the required time limit.
2. Mike S. – Gentlemen’s Club “Collector of Moments.”
3. Joe K. – Has the fastest dog gone boat on this side of the Mississippi.
Cost:
We're anticipating the cost of the camping trip to be about $500 for the entire weekend, or $175/day. This will include all food/booze on the island, Thursday night hotel, boat and campsite rentals, and general camping supplies (propane, paper plates, utensils, ice, water, etc). This cost does not cover anything else we do off the island. Also, to help keep costs down and to also make sure we don't over/under buy on alcohol, suggest we all bring 1 or 2 bottles of whatever you'd like to drink - including your competition tequila.
We have to buy a lot of “necessities” in advance and will also be shopping during the weekend - so please bring cash so we can collect up front. Any overages will be divvied up and distributed back in shots of leftover tequila and chicken wings.
What to Bring:
I've attached a checklist to help you prepare for the weekend that we've used the past several years. But as a specific suggestion – bring a comfy beach chair! If there is anything on the list you do not have
and don’t want to buy (like a sleeping bag, air mattress, flashlight, clean underwear, Spartan attire etc), let me know so we can see who else has extras they can bring for you. If you have any camping supplies, like tents, coolers, lanterns, flashlights, etc, please let me know that too. We definitely need 2 more tents!
Logistics:
We'll be meeting at the Bottle King on Rt. 4 in Upper Saddle River, NJ at 2pm on Thursday. We’ll drive up Convoy style to the Blue Water Manor and get there just in time for the wet t-shirt contest. If you
can't convoy up with us you can meet us there. Just let us know in advance when you are planning on coming out in case we need to send someone out from the island with the boat. We’ve got the site until
Monday, and will start breaking camp after breakfast that morning… anyone arriving after that… well… they will be on their own.
Ok, that’s the scoop for now. Let me know if you have any questions, concerns, divine inspirations, trepidations, or words of wisdom.
Are There Women?!
Larry (Co-Founder) reponds:
I can't believe Todd didn't include more detail about all the hot women in the itinerary. Because our trip coincides with Americade, usually Thurs night at Blue Water Manor is wet t-shirt night. Last year's winner actually ended up coming out with 6 of her friends to our island to party. They hung out with us, still in their bikinis and wet t-shirts until about 1am when the water sheriff came with his automatic squirt gun and forcibly escorted the women back to the mainland.
Friday night is usually Carthaginian Sacrifice night and all the other campers on the other islands bring their virgin daughters in ritual sacrifice to the idols. We of course don't actually sacrifice the virgins, but in a more modern and humane version of this ancient practice, acting as agents on behalf of the idol we "sacrifice" them by having them dance for us in sacred ritual garb (and you don't want to miss the sacred ritual garb).
Saturday night is usually a 'recovery' night in which we recover all the MILFs and Cougars that weren't included in Thurs or Friday night. Hey, even older women deserve some time with the idol.
Sunday night is a bit more low-key since that is when the Tequila Crown is determined. But one perk of tequila night is that we have the tequila equivalent of Boxing Round Girls who pass out shots of tequila with Rick's custom tequila paddle. Strangely enough, Sunday nights on the island are about 15-25 degrees warmer than other nights and to keep from dehydrating the girls usually have to drink large amounts of tequila and take off their bikinis.
So I know, I know... sounds like a boring trip. But at least we have tequila on Sunday night.
I can't believe Todd didn't include more detail about all the hot women in the itinerary. Because our trip coincides with Americade, usually Thurs night at Blue Water Manor is wet t-shirt night. Last year's winner actually ended up coming out with 6 of her friends to our island to party. They hung out with us, still in their bikinis and wet t-shirts until about 1am when the water sheriff came with his automatic squirt gun and forcibly escorted the women back to the mainland.
Friday night is usually Carthaginian Sacrifice night and all the other campers on the other islands bring their virgin daughters in ritual sacrifice to the idols. We of course don't actually sacrifice the virgins, but in a more modern and humane version of this ancient practice, acting as agents on behalf of the idol we "sacrifice" them by having them dance for us in sacred ritual garb (and you don't want to miss the sacred ritual garb).
Saturday night is usually a 'recovery' night in which we recover all the MILFs and Cougars that weren't included in Thurs or Friday night. Hey, even older women deserve some time with the idol.
Sunday night is a bit more low-key since that is when the Tequila Crown is determined. But one perk of tequila night is that we have the tequila equivalent of Boxing Round Girls who pass out shots of tequila with Rick's custom tequila paddle. Strangely enough, Sunday nights on the island are about 15-25 degrees warmer than other nights and to keep from dehydrating the girls usually have to drink large amounts of tequila and take off their bikinis.
So I know, I know... sounds like a boring trip. But at least we have tequila on Sunday night.
A Proper Gentlemen's Club Decline
Rich G submits:
As usual the weekend looks awesome and while I hesitate to send regrets (at the risk of becoming a target of Sir Eisenstat) it looks like my participation is doubtful this year....
So where am I going to get my burning log jumping fix? Google it and you will soon realize that this is an activity that seems not to be known outside the confines of Huckleberry Isle. Odd you say... I think not! Ponder the question a bit and it will become obvious that this activity must be sparked by something indigenous to the island. I submit to you, the esteemed members of the Lake George Gentleman's Club, that this behavior is due to the influence of nothing other than..... the Idol. As what else could it be? What could cause grown men to risk life, limb, and taint by jumping over a fire stoked ever higher, to walk across a burning felled tree in sandals meant to traverse beaches, to attempt to explode glass bottles in close proximity to oneself, and to launch metal objects far into the night when the location of their return to terra firma cannot be guessed? It can only be explained by the power of the Idol!
So while I regret that I will not be able to pay homage I know you will make up for my absence and outdo the antics of years past. For it seems that each year the appetite of the Idol grows and can only be satiated by ever more elaborate secret rituals that if discovered, would cause the fingers of our wives (or significant/insignificant others) to be pointed and for them to utter the words: "What were you thinking.... dumb-ass"
Make me proud. I am sorry to miss it!
As usual the weekend looks awesome and while I hesitate to send regrets (at the risk of becoming a target of Sir Eisenstat) it looks like my participation is doubtful this year....
So where am I going to get my burning log jumping fix? Google it and you will soon realize that this is an activity that seems not to be known outside the confines of Huckleberry Isle. Odd you say... I think not! Ponder the question a bit and it will become obvious that this activity must be sparked by something indigenous to the island. I submit to you, the esteemed members of the Lake George Gentleman's Club, that this behavior is due to the influence of nothing other than..... the Idol. As what else could it be? What could cause grown men to risk life, limb, and taint by jumping over a fire stoked ever higher, to walk across a burning felled tree in sandals meant to traverse beaches, to attempt to explode glass bottles in close proximity to oneself, and to launch metal objects far into the night when the location of their return to terra firma cannot be guessed? It can only be explained by the power of the Idol!
So while I regret that I will not be able to pay homage I know you will make up for my absence and outdo the antics of years past. For it seems that each year the appetite of the Idol grows and can only be satiated by ever more elaborate secret rituals that if discovered, would cause the fingers of our wives (or significant/insignificant others) to be pointed and for them to utter the words: "What were you thinking.... dumb-ass"
Make me proud. I am sorry to miss it!
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